Prayer

Using My Network

My sister-in-law Alison is in the hospital. She had been in a rehab facility, recovering from surgery, and was scheduled to go home a couple of days ago when her oxygen levels dropped. She was taken to the hospital instead, where they determined she has COVID, paired with pneumonia. Today she is stable, but it is still scary. She headed into this health crisis while fighting her way back from another, and she is physically fragile.

I want to tell you a few things about Alison. A widow twice over- first, after my brother-in-law Marty died way too young of lung cancer, and second, twenty years later, after her kind, total mensch of a partner Bob suffered a fatal heart attack- Alison could easily have become bitter, or self-pitying, or both, but instead, she says she feels fortunate to have had two such wonderful men in her life.

Alison is humble but indomitable. She is not only my sister-in-law, but my dear friend.

When I first met Alison I was a teenager and she was a new mother. Out of the gate she was welcoming to me. Her default is grace.

So now, that I’ve told you about Alison, I’d like to talk a bit about prayer, as it relates to Alison.

You see, when it comes to asking for help, prayer-wise, I am a fair-weather friend. I am comfortable expressing gratitude, my mantra being thank you, thank you, thank you, but not asking for favors, except during in-flight turbulence. I prefer to outsource my pleas to those who have that kind of relationship with God. I guess you could say I have faith by extension.

I am this moment sending so much gratitude for Alison’s instinctive kindness, for how she wore that apple green floral matron of honor dress at my wedding without a single eye-roll, for calmly navigating our sisters-in-law road trip to DC to protest the Iraq war, for bringing her mashed potatoes to Rosh Hashanah and Passover. For her ready laugh, her listening ear and her enormous heart, I say thank you. Then, I turn over the reins to my praying friends and family who make a practice of the trusting kind of faith that isn’t afraid to ask for help.